The Morning Walk

It surely has to be a sin of the highest order to pay heed to that 6 am alarm and to throw aside the incredibly languorous cocoon of indolence that had wrapped us, layer on layer, and lulled our harried bodies and minds over a long night. It surely has to be a crime against conscience to sit up and stretch all those muscles and thoughts that have been steeped in sleep, despite the angels and cherubs and little pink piggies and cuddly bears all hanging on to our bedclothes and imploring us not to. And only sheer masochism can make us tear off the warm clothes that have become our second skin, baring the flesh to the cruelty of freshness and laying on them the indignity of things like sports wear. O cruelty, thy name is fitness.

But all said, there is something that makes us rise cursing the clock, but rise nonetheless. And groan our way into socks and shoes and step out into the morning light. For morning is, undisputably, the best time to be awake, and go for a walk.

This is a Facebook post from four years ago... its time it went into my blog.


Mommy Porn

Another day began with an inane article in the newspaper. The supplement is known to be a veritable storehouse for useless fiction and trivia, and yet which insidiously compel even the most discerning reader to take a peek, just a small glance, and indulge the silliest parts of our humour and imagination.

Today's paper featured an article on the reaction of today's youth to their parents reading mommy porn. The very term mommy porn fills me with distaste. Get serious, if mommy didn't watch porn, you'd probably be still a languishing sperm or egg somewhere in the nether regions. One of the youngsters, a 20 year old media consultant, female, had written that she found her mother reading 'Fifty Shades of Grey' and found it so unbearably gross that she felt like gouging her eyes out (I hope she meant her own), and if that did not lessen her mortification, dying.

Die, I say. You don't deserve to be alive if you are such a humbug in the name of humanity. I mean, what kind of a person would say something like that of her father/mother? Is reading erotica like the above-mentioned novel, or some M&B, or some other junk out there a castigation of a person's character? We all have read erotica on the sly, at some point or the other in our life, and ESPECIALLY in our youth. So what makes the youth of today so puerile and hypocritical as to slam their poor parents for indulging in a very human impulse? Come on, you think you were conceived immaculately? Someone go tell them what their parents did 20 years ago!

I was young once. Age has crept up on me, not so much in spirit, but in the number of years that feature in the least important but most looked-at places, like official records. But I still love Tom and Jerry, I love watching MAD and creating colourful fish out of tissue paper and sequins. I enjoy licking my plate clean. I may not find 'saas bahu' to my taste, but I glutton out on Grey's Anatomy, and Big Bang Theory. And my absolute favorites are Po, Shrek, the donkey-dragon babies, Sid, Diego, Manny, Ellie, Peaches, and the whole jing bang lot! And Tom & Jerry, in case you forgot that one.

So, who says you have to do a certain thing at a certain age and ostensibly let go of other pleasures? Why can't mommy like a bit of romance and spice in her life, especially since she's worn out the skin off her back slaving for the likes of you, getting you ready for school, helping you with your homework, and tending to you when you wailed for no reason in the middle of the night, instead of romping in the bed with Daddy?

So take your holier-than-thou attitudes to hell, and give Mommy a break, will you? 

And while we are out here, can someone start a motion or something against this 'mommy porn' phrase? It hardly suggests what it turns out to be suggesting.

(Posted on September 12, 2012)